You ever get an RSVP and feel like it’s asking for your soul’s deepest secrets, not just if you’ll come for some free food and awkward small talk? Yep, me too. Let’s flip that script.
Whether you’re heading to a party, dodging a wedding season invite, or making your cat your official plus one, here’s your arsenal of funny RSVP responses that’ll have hosts either laughing or wondering if you’ve finally lost it. Either way, mood set, mission accomplished.
RSVP Responses That’ll Make Any Party Start Early
These are for when you want the host to know: you’re bringing the humorous vibes before you even show up, if you even do.
- Yes, I’m coming, and I’m bringing my social battery, freshly recharged… for at least the first hour.
- Count me in! Will there be cake or should I bring my own emergency slice?
- RSVP: I’ll be there, but only if my imaginary friend gets a plus one.
- I’m coming. But I’m leaving if the DJ plays “Cha Cha Slide.”
- Declining, but only because my Netflix account said I’ve got important bingeing scheduled.
- Yes! I’ll be at the party, dancing like no one’s watching (they probably shouldn’t).
- RSVP: No, I’m washing my pet rock that night.
- I’m in! And I’m bringing enough inside jokes to confuse all the new people.
Funny Wedding RSVP Responses That’ll Make the Couple Smile
Because it’s a wedding, not a tax audit. Time to break out the funny wedding RSVP responses that balance charm with cheek.
- Will attend. Only here for the open bar and emotional speeches I can judge.
- RSVP: Attending — I need new inside jokes for future gatherings.
- Decline — allergic to wedding season and public displays of affection.
- Count me in! Who else is throwing cake at people for fun?
- I’ll be there if I can sit next to the fun table. You know the one.
- Coming. Only because I heard there’s a dance floor and questionable moves to be made.
- Not attending. My pillow needs me that night for a serious meeting.
Witty RSVP Wording for Birthday Bash Invites
For those funny RSVP wording for birthday moments that deserve some sparkle or at least a giggle.
- I’ll be there, wearing my best “I didn’t forget your birthday party” face.
- Sorry, can’t come. Got a case of birthday-itis and can’t leave the couch.
- Count me in! I’m here for the gifts I didn’t buy.
- Will attend. Only for the cake. And the free food. And maybe you.
- RSVP: No can do — my goldfish has a recital.
- Yes, attending. Who else is gonna keep the balloon animals in check?
Sarcastic RSVP Responses for the Bold Guest
Sometimes you just gotta let that sarcastic flag fly high.
- Decline: Oh no, I wouldn’t wanna have fun at a social gathering or anything.
- Will attend if I can leave after five minutes without guilt.
- RSVP: Coming, unless I win the lottery before then.
- Not attending — too busy alphabetizing my sock drawer.
- I’ll be there, but I expect an award for best-dressed. Or I’m out.
Lighthearted Acceptance Replies That Warm the Host’s Heart
Okay, maybe you actually like these people. These lighthearted acceptance lines say “yes” with a wink.
- Absolutely attending couldn’t miss it unless I was abducted by aliens.
- Count me in! And I promise to only talk about my cat half the time.
- I’ll be there with bells on. Well, maybe just one bell. Let’s not get wild.
- Yes! Ready to make memories and questionable decisions.
- RSVP: Coming! Can’t wait for the social event funniness you’re planning.
Playful RSVP Declines That Don’t Feel Like a Dagger to the Heart
Declining an invite? Make it sting less with these humorous declines.
- Can’t come. I have a standing date with my couch cushions.
- Decline. I’ve double-booked myself with a very serious me-day.
- RSVP: Sadly no. My plant-sitter bailed, and my succulents can’t be trusted.
- Won’t make it. I’m already overwhelmed just thinking about my social calendar.
- Sorry! I’m on a strict schedule of doing absolutely nothing that day.
Clever RSVP Lines for Workplace Events
Because sometimes workplace event invites need a little more jazz.
- Will attend. Gotta see if the boss actually does the Macarena this year.
- I’ll be there. Someone’s gotta test the shrimp cocktail’s safety.
- Yes, attending! Can’t wait for the awkward small talk.
- Decline. I’ve got an important date with some spreadsheets.
- Coming — but only if I can hide by the bar all night.
Funny Plus One RSVP Ideas That Make the List Pop
Your plus one can be real, imaginary, or somewhere in between.
- RSVP: Yes, plus my cat she’s very well-mannered at dinners.
- I’ll be there! Plus my pillow for moral support.
- Count me +1: My imaginary friend insists on attending.
- Attending! My pet rock will stay home this time bad behavior last event.
- I’m coming solo unless my Netflix subscription counts as a guest.
Cheeky RSVP Wording for Formal Events
Just cause it’s formal doesn’t mean it can’t be cheeky.
- Attending! I’ll try not to trip on the fancy carpet.
- Decline. My tux is at the cleaners and so is my will to socialize.
- RSVP: Yes, and I’ll be judging the hors d’oeuvres mercilessly.
- Will come, but only for the tiny food on sticks.
- Can’t make it. My monocle’s in the shop.
Witty Regrets for Parties That’ll Leave ‘Em Laughing
Let ‘em down easy with witty regrets for that next party you skip.
- Not coming. I’m socially committed to reorganizing my Tupperware drawer.
- Can’t make it. My goldfish has separation anxiety.
- Decline. My couch and I are working on our relationship.
- RSVP: No, but I’ll send a funny RSVP message in my place.
- Not attending. My mirror says I’m too good-looking for this event.
Funny RSVP Messages for Friends Who’ll Get the Joke
Because RSVP responses for friends can be a whole vibe.
- I’ll be there, mainly to see how you’ll embarrass yourself this time.
- RSVP: Coming! Someone’s gotta keep an eye on you.
- No can do. My social battery is in low-power mode.
- Count me in, but only cause I owe you one.
- Decline. I’ve hit my monthly limit of seeing people I like.
RSVP Humor That’ll Keep the Invites Coming
Sometimes you want the invite next time too, so go for RSVP humor that keeps it light.
- Yes! Wouldn’t miss it unless the universe intervenes. Again.
- RSVP: Attending I hear there’ll be open bar and free food.
- Decline. I’ve been banned from fun this week. Doctor’s orders.
- I’ll be there. And I’ll bring my lighthearted energy. Or snacks. Probably snacks.
- Coming! And I promise not to start any food fights… probably.
So, there you go. Over 65 funny RSVP responses to choose from whether you’re looking for creative RSVP wording, a witty event response, or just trying to dodge an invite with style. What’s your go-to line? Got a funnier one? Drop it below or tag that friend who always RSVPs like a legend!
